It’s been awhile, and we’ve received more than one email wondering if, like the prototypical old man who “always kept to himself”, the BLOHARDS might have expired sometime in November and been mummifying, unlamented, on the floor of a rundown home ever since. Fear not! Creaky and truculent though they might be, the BLOHARDS endure into what is, by some accountings, their forty ninth year. It is going to be a humdinger of a season, highlighted by Koji Uehara’s winning of the Cy Young Award (you heard it here first), and the BLOHARDS are going to be in the middle of it.
Things to note:
Dues are due. Not doing them? A don’t. Dues-paying members receive (i) a nifty membership card; (ii) a handy wallet-sized BLOHARDS-issued Sox schedule; (iii) a BLOHARDS bumper sticker, the sticking of which to vehicle’s bumper is guaranteed to improve said vehicle’s gas mileage by not less than 15%; and (iv) warm feelings of solidarity. Non-duespayers have to live with their consciences. Annual membership is a laughable bargain at $20, while lifetime memberships at $150 are a must for that small handful of BLOHARDS not yet receiving social security. Memberships may be purchased online, or by mailing a check and the requisite form to Julie Powers Killian at 42 Forest Ave., Rye, NY 10580.
The Opener? Where else would we be? It’s way past time to get on the bus for this year’s home opener (Word to the wise: next year send an email to Ray Duffy shortly after, but not before, never before, midnight on January 1st, humbly requesting a spot on the 2014 trip. Also, pay your dues.), but non-riders can attend vicariously through a detailed account to be contained in our April newsletter. Look for it in your inbox sometime in June.
Lunch! Last year, we got a brutal lunch schedule and a brutal team. This year we’ve got a dream schedule. Do we have to connect the dots for you? Lunches will be held at the Yale Club on Friday May 31st, and again on Friday September 6th and they’re gonna be lollapaloozas: Slideshow… Pizzarelli… Chicken… Uehara… Buttered Rolls… WFAN’s Ed Randall’s talking about prostates*… What could be more fun? It’s pretty much imperative to get your tickets now.
Yanks fess up. So Lance Armstrong evidently admitted to some corner-cutting, and maybe he wasn’t the nicest guy and blah, blah, blah. Booooring. The big confession of the offseason came from the Bronx where the Yankees not only admitted to evilness, but went to court to assert that they alone could be described as “evil”. In a resounding victory for the team, a three-judge panel at the Trademark Trial and Appeal Board wrote: “The record shows that there is only one Evil Empire in baseball and it is the New York Yankees…” Up next: A-Rod to sue over a local smoothie chain’s use of the catchphrase “Juicing NYC since 1999”.
Are we allowed to make fun of Derek Jeter yet? We had a little comparison of Derek Jeter to Zoolander we were going to include in a newsletter last fall and then he went and broke his ankle and it didn’t seem right. Well, he’s supposedly healthy again, and who knows how long that’s going to last, so here goes...
*Specific features of lunch not guaranteed and subject to change. Except for Ed Randall talking about prostates. Ed Randall will talk about prostates.