Benevolent and Loyal Order of Honorable Ancient Red Sox Die Hard Sufferers of New York  since 1965

June 10, 2010 - 1:31 am

May 2010 Luncheon Recap

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When the Going Gets Tough, the BLOHARDS Eat Lunch »

June 2010

Nobody Lunches Like the BLOHARDS
May Lunch Recap
Slide Show Soars

"A" Material Trumps Inept Presentation

"I know Ray Duffy. Ray Duffy is a friend of mine. And you are no Ray Duffy."

With regular narrator Ray Duffy grounded in London by volcanic ash, BLOHARDs Peter Collery and Chris Wertz agreed to take a stab at presenting the Henry Berry Memorial Slide Show in his stead. They failed. Failed, failed, failed. Failed.

Mercifully, you can't keep good material down and the tongue-tied twosome did manage to elicit a few chuckles. Among the highlights:
A picture of CC Sabathia after the ate the Blue Jays;
The bestowal of the Horse's Ass Award to prior 37-time winner Alex Rodriguez. A-Rod's running across Oakland Lefty Dallas Braden's mound so enraged the A that he tossed a perfect game the next time out;
An imagined description by John Sterling of the Yanks' visit to the White House: "It's the see the Obamas. They're between "Barack" and a hard place. Ribbie double. (pause) Driven by Jeep."
The Jackie Robinsons Foundation requesting that the Orioles honor Jackie's memory by not wearing #42.

There's more material where that came from, and SRO crowds are expected to watch Ray Duffy deliver it at our next lunch on September 24. You'd be well advised to get your tickets now.

McDonald Charms

Early-Season Hero Forthrightly Confronts "Zippy Chippy" Episode; Provides Insight Into Clubhouse

Once upon a time, there was a "race" horse named Zippy Chippy who, while he may have been chippy (he evidently had a habit of biting), was anything but zippy.
The horse failed to triumph in any of its 100 career races. On a summer evening in 2001, Rochester NY witnessed a 40 yard dash between this slugish-but-belligerent throughbred and a then-unhearlalded minor-league baseball player.

Surprisingly, the humans often win this sort of contest since, absent a starting gate, it typically takes the horse 30 yards to realize that the race has even started. On this, of all nights, though, Zippy broke early and romped home a winner thereby besmirching a young man with a stain that he'll never erase: The only creature in history to lose to Zippy Chippy.

While a lesser man might have broken, this youngster shook off the ignominy and perservered. And sure enough, in the fullness of time, against all odds, he matured
into a not only a starting outfielder for the Boston Red Sox, but also the keynote speaker at the Spring 2010 BLOHARDS lunch. That young man, ladies and gentlemen, was... Darnell McDonald.

Anyhoo, Mr. McDonald turns out to be a gracious, funny and generous guest. Among other informative nuggets, McDonald:
Described his favorite players on the Sox as Dustin Pedroia and, somewhat surprisingly, J. D. Drew. Drew was reported to have a dry sense of humor, commenting for instance that "If the Umpires called 'em straight, I'd walk every time."
Told of his extraordinary high school football career (6,000 yards rushed) and of his decision to pursue baseball instead for the bonus money.
Said hitting a game-saving pinch-hit home run in his first at-bat as a Red Sox (Sock?) was the greatest feeling of his life, and that he "couldn't feel his feet" as he rounded the bases.
And, oh, about a rematch with Zippy Chippy? McDonald is "All for it."

September Lunch Coming Into Focus
With WFAN's Ed Randall, WEEI's Dave O'Brien, author Bob Sullivan, a Sox player to be named later, the promise of Narragansett Beer, the possible return of author (This BAD Day in Yankees History) Gabriel Schecter, a new song and some recycled Carnacs by John Pizzarelli, trivia with John Quinn, and Ray Duffy and the slideshow, this is already the longest sentence ever written in one of our newsletters. We will also be blessed by the presence of twenty-five members of the Boston-based Bosox Club (think BLOHARDS without all the character-building adversity).

Pizzarelli Channels Carson Channeling Carnac

Is it just me, or did he do that "catch 22" bit before?
Minus the turban but armed with a batch of envelopes that had been "hermetically sealed inside a mayonnaise jar on Funk & Wagnall's porch since noon today," a fearless John Pizzarelli faced the famously fickle BLOHARD audience with a new batch of Carnacs. You know the deal...Johnny Carson used to divine answers to unknown and top secret questions. Some highlights:

A: The Andromeda Strain. Q: Name the only injury Nick Johnson hasn't had in his career.

A: Catch-22. Q: What Gary Sheffield would do if you hit him a hundred fly balls.

A: Halfway. Q: What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic.

I'm Just Sayin...
Sox 17-6 Since Luncheon
After limping into the May 17 luncheon as the team that had prevented the least runs in the AL (then giving up 11 that night), the Sox have turned things around and put themselves back into the thick of the AL East race.

Lester, Beltre, Papi, and VMart led the post-luncheon charge. Even the maddening Dice-K has minimized those 1 K, 8 BB games (just the one), even flirting with a no-hitter against the Phillies.

More positive news - Darnell McDonald, our player attendee, fared better than past guests who had either been waived or sent to minors during the salad course. As of this writing he remains with the big team.

Our ole' buddy...
Bob Mills writes in to report, amazingly, that copies of his book Baseball, Then and Now which features an entire chapter on the BLOHARDS are still available from the author for the low, low, price of $20 postpaid. Bet he'd even autograph one for you if you asked nicely.

Justice for Sherm!
Titus Brings Campaign to BLOHARDS
For some number of years Gary Titus has been agitating for the admission of his friend, the immortal, albeit deceased, Sherm Feller, into the Red Sox Hall of Fame. Sherm was the original polymath who, in addition to serving as Fenway Park's iconic PA announcer, was a friend of Frank Sinatra's, a hit songwriter ("Summertime, Summertime" by the Jamies), and one-time husband of Bozo's assistant.

Anyhoo, in connection with his appearance at the BLOHARD lunch, Gary prepared a video which makes Sherm come to life in a really magical and very entertaining way. It's must-watch. You can see it here.

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BLOHARDs since 1965